Ninety Years Without Slumbering

 A week ago, I had trouble sleeping as sometimes happens now that I am in my maturity.  I got up around midnight and took in a rerun of a Twilight Zone episode.  This one was entitled Ninety Years Without Slumbering.  Each episode begins with a narration.  Here’s the narration for this episode:

Each man measures his time; some with hope, some with joy, some with fear. But Sam Forstmann measures his allotted time by a grandfather's clock, a unique mechanism whose pendulum swings between life and death, a very special clock that keeps a special kind of time—in the Twilight Zone.

This episode was based, as you might surmise, on the old song, The Grandfather Clock.  To summarize the song, it has the old man, who is in a close relationship with the grandfather clock, dies when the clock stops shirt, never to go again.

 It was a pretty good episode – not one of the best in my opinion – but enjoyable as almost all the episodes of this classic series are.  It was a clever idea which had a twist at the end as all Twilight Zone episodes must.  The old man in the episode was played by venerable character actor Ed Wynn, who fit the part of the old man perfectly. All well and good.  However, there was a suprize ending for me personally.  I was watching this on the eve of my seventy-sixth birthday on April 1, 2025.  And as I have been saying, at this stage in my life, there’s no fools like an old fool.

The surprise for this fool was that the Sam Forstmann character played by Ed Wynn was – you guessed it – seventy- six years old.  Now you have to appreciate that Ed Wynn appeared in my eyes to be exactly what he was portraying - an old man.  There was no way, in my mind’s eye, that I was an old man – even if I was about to turn 76.  I am able to rationalize the dissonance of this by saying that 76 today is not what it was in 1963 when it was aired.  In those ancient days 76 was old – wasn’t it?  Well, I can consol myself that 76 today is the new fifty or perhaps 60 – if I want to kid myself.  Some days I don’t feel that old.  However, some days I do – especially after a less than good night’s sleep.

In any case, I must admit that I don’t look 50 or even 60 if I look closely at my reflection – if the lighting is good.  My days are dwindling down to a precious few- or hopefully, perhaps more than a few.  It matters more than even what I do with the time I have left – however long that is.

Thoughts for the journey.

 

ordo amoris

Time seems to be taking on a life of its own in Trump-time and things might have happened yesterday or a few weeks ago – perhaps that is a result of Trump ‘flooding the zone’ in every possible way in the United States and beyond its borders.  A while ago? – United States Vice-president J.D. Vance used a theological term, ordo amoris, to justify the Trumpian approach the United States government is using in its actions to eliminate foreign aid. 

Here’s the statement by Vance on this:

But there’s this old-school concept—and I think a very Christian concept, by the way—that you love your family, and then you love your neighbor, and then you love your community, and then you love your fellow citizens in your own country, and then after that you can focus and prioritize the rest of the world.

Basically, Vance is using this principle to justify the approach by the Trumpian government to say charity begins and ends at home.  I guess he might grudgingly agree that if the needs of all Americans are met, they might give the few crumbs under the Trumpian table to non-Americans.  Putting aside the conclusion that the Trump government is doing everything they can to not share the wealth with people at home, this understanding of ordo amoris seems to be off base to say the least.

I must admit that I was unfamiliar with ordo amoris before it was used by Vance.  One definition on-line defines it this way:

"Ordo amoris," meaning "order of loves" or "ordered loves," is a theological concept explored by St. Augustine in his "City of God," emphasizing the importance of loving God above all else and arranging our affections in a way that reflects God's goodness.

I believe that Vance, who recently converted to the Roman Catholic faith, should perhaps review what Jesus Christ said about all this.  He stated, when asked which are the greatest commandment, replied:  

Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.’ The second is this: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’  There is no commandment greater than these.

The account in the Gospel of Luke has a smart-ass lawyer asking Jesus in response, “who is my neighbour.”  Jesus responds with the parable of the Good Samaritan.  The lawyer was probably the J.D. Vance of Jesus' time, but he seemed to get the point that charity Is not restricted to the home-front.  Jesus chose the Samaritan to be the example to live up to because they were not who that lawyer or other Jews thought of as their neighbours.  They were, in effect, the black sheep of the Semite family. 

So, does odor amoris mean that we should give to foreigners in needs above those close to us – starting with our family and working outward and eventually getting to some person or persons we don’t know in a far away land – if there is anything left to give? 

Here is a good response I found on The Catholic World Report https://www.catholicworldreport.com/2025/02/10/vice-president-vance-the-good-samaritan-and-the-order-of-love/

The principle of the ordo amoris, however, is a counsel of prudence; it is not an absolute moral maxim; it presupposes that all other things are equal. But if all other things are not equal, our evaluation of whom to prioritize may change. A greater need in a more distantly related neighbor, which I can alleviate here and now, should often be given preference over a lesser need in a more closely related neighbor.

The principle in all this is Love.  This is the message of Jesus Christ.  The challenge of Christians is, how do we show the love of Jesus to our neighbours.  Something to contemplate and respond to on your journey.

  

The Parable of the Stones

 I was rereading chapter 4 of the Prodigal God, by Timothy Keller, in preparation for our book study tomorrow.  Keller recounts the apocryphal parable i.e. not in the bible, of Peter and the stones.  It is recounted below:

One day Jesus said to his disciples: “I’d like you to carry a stone for me.”  He didn’t give any explanation. So the disciples looked around for a stone to carry, and Peter (bless his heart), being the practical sort, sought out the smallest stone he could possibly find.  After all, Jesus didn’t give any regulation for weight and size! So, he put it in his pocket.

Jesus then said: “Follow Me.” He led them on a journey.
About noontime Jesus had everyone sit down. He waved his hands, and all the stones turned to bread. He said, “Now it’s time for lunch.”  In a few seconds, Peter’s lunch was over.  When lunch was done Jesus told them to stand up.

He said again, “I’d like you to carry a stone for me.”
This time Peter said, “Aha! Now I get it!” So, he looked around and saw a small boulder. He hoisted it on his back, and it was painful, it made him stagger.  But he said, “I can’t wait for supper.”  Jesus then said: “Follow Me.” He led them on a journey, with Peter barely being able to keep up. Around supper time Jesus led them to the side of a river. He said, “Now everyone throw your stones into the water.”

They did. Then he said, “Follow Me,” and began to walk.
Peter and the others looked at him dumbfounded.
Jesus sighed and said, “Don’t you remember what I asked you to do?  Who were you carrying the stone for?”

In this season on Lent, it may be helpful to consider what stones you are carrying and for whom you are carrying them.

Being Truly Humble

I am currently leading a Lenten book study at my church, St. John the Evangelist, Strathroy, Ontario.  We are studying The Prodigal God by Timothy Keller.  The book is an analysis of Jesus’ parable of the Prodigal Son. 

One of the points the author makes is that the Father in the parable puts aside his station and acts in a way that the patriarch in his time would not.  He accedes to the demand of the younger, prodigal son to give him his share of his inheritance.  Keller notes that this is like the son saying to the father, you are dead to me as the inheritance would not be given until the father was dead.  If this happened in that time, the father would normally have disowned and driven out the son in disgrace.  Further, when the prodigal younger son comes to his senses and returns in defeat, the father sees him in a distance and runs to greet him.  Keller notes that in those times, a patriarch would never run as it was undignified.

In effect, the father in the parable is portrayed by Jesus as putting aside his pride and humbling himself because of his love for his son.  I would like to explore what it means to be humble.  I believe that the key to true humility is to see yourself clearly. 

Cole Arthur Riley declares, “I linger in the mirror, and I don’t look away.”  To see yourself and not look away is, I believe, key to self-knowledge which, in turn, is necessary for true humility.  It can be a challenge to see yourself clearly.  I remember reading a definition of humility that really grabbed hold of me.  To be truly humble is to see yourself clearly.  This was a bit of a puzzle initially, but on reflection, I realized that if you see yourself clearly you will realize that you are not the self-image that you have constructed for yourself – this is sometimes called the persona.  To look in the mirror and not look away is to see yourself clearly with all the wrinkles and spots - age spots and a hairline which seems to be receding each day.  Of course, that is the physical part of myself.  It is also true for the soul and spirit as well as the body.  The impulse is to look away or at least not look too closely at any of these parts.

Author Judy Cannato speaks of an alternative way of looking at yourself in all your imperfections.  It is to take a long loving look at the real:

She speaks of the approach to contemplation by “Dorothee Sölle [1929–2003] who maintains that radical amazement is the starting point for contemplation. Often, we think of contemplation as a practice that belongs in the realm of the religious, some esoteric advanced stage of prayer that only the spiritually gifted possess. This is not the case…. The nature of contemplation as I describe it here is one that lies well within the capacity of each of us. To use a familiar phrase, contemplation amounts to “taking a long loving look at the real.”

God knows – literally and figuratively – that there are aspects of myself which I wish I didn’t have.  They are the ghosts that visit me at 4:00 in the morning – things I have done I wished I had not done or had done differently and the things I had not done I wish I had done – it is tempting to complete this with the line form the prayer in the Anglican Book of Common Prayer, ‘and there is no health in me’.  But no matter in what way my reality of myself does not live up to my self-image, I know that there is health in me because I am created by a loving God. 

However, what I have learned over the years is that I am loved despite, or perhaps even because, of who I am.  I can love myself because this is the way that I was made with my strengths and weaknesses.  I can love myself because God created me this way and God loves all that God created.  I have not learned this easily and am still learning it.

I will close with another saying about humility, ‘being truly humble means that you cannot be humiliated.’  As someone who has been humiliated at times in my life, I know that I have not achieved true humility despite my best efforts.  That is something I can seek this season of Lent.

May you be blessed to greet the person you see each morning in the mirror with humility and also acceptance and understanding.

 

Lent for All of Us

 Sunday was the first Sunday of Lent.  Lent is not something that you will find in the bible.  There is no Lenten observance in the bible.  It was not and is not part of the Jewish religion, so it was not something that Jesus observed or even the first Christians who were all Jews. It is one of the seasons in the church year like Advent or Pentecost or Christmas or Easter.  Advent and Lent are similar in that they are times of preparation.  Advent is a time of preparation for Christmas and in the same way Lent is preparation for Easter. 

Lent began last Wednesday, and we marked it with the Ash Wednesday observances.  If you were at the Ash Wednesday service here or other places you would have received a cross in ashes on your forehead.  The ashes were produced by burning the palm crosses from last Easter. 

When the priest marks you with the cross, he or she states, ‘remember you are dust and to dust you shall return.’  It is a reminder that we are mortal and our time on earth is limited.  We must consider how we use that time.  We know that we do not always live the life God intends for us.  That is one way of looking at sin.  We sin when we separate ourselves from God and do not live God intends us to live. 

So, we are now in a time of preparation for Easter.   We have forty days in total to reflect on our lives, to repent those things that keep us from being in relationship with God.  We do this in two ways.  First we acknowledge that we have done things we should not have done and commit to not do them.  Second, we acknowledge those things we have not done that we should have done and commit to doing them.  We know that being human and imperfect we will not succeed all the time but we have the intention of making the effort to do just that.  Often in Lent we focus on giving up something as a sacrifice.  We will forego something that we desire as a way of following God.  We can give up a favourite food or some activity we enjoy as a symbol of our need to change our lives.  You could call this the way of negation.  You can also take the way of affirmation by doing something that you have not been doing previously.  This could be contributing time, energy, and financial resources assist those in need. 

Lent is, in its essence, a Christian practice.  However, it can be helpful for non-Christians.  Here is a quote from a Christian source, Anne Germond, the acting Primate of the Anglican Church of Canada, which can be applied to everyone’s life in this time:

But what if we thought of Lent as a God-given time of disruption the normal flow of our lives, inviting us to re-examine them, laying bare and shining the spotlight on all that is wrong – the pathological unease or “disease” in our world?  In the context of global warming, greed, violence abroad and at home, and of our inability to seek peace with our neighbours…

 

I found the following on the internet which addresses both ways – giving up things i.e. fasting and doing something new i.e. feasting or feeding our souls:

Fast from fear; Feast on Faith
Fast from despair; Feed on hope.
Fast from depressing news; Feed on prayer.
Fast from discontent; Feast on gratitude.
Fast from anger and worry; Feed on patience.
Fast from negative thinking; Feast on positive thinking.
Fast from bitterness; Feed on love and forgiveness.
Fast from words that wound; Feast on words that heal.
Fast from gravity; Feast on joy and humour.

May we all find ways to fast and feast in this season of Lent. 

It’s a Good Life – Perhaps Not

The ambush that took place in the White House Oval Office last week on the President of the Ukraine by U.S. President Trump and Vice-President Vance, brought to mind one of the classic episodes of the classic T.V. 1960’s series the Twilight Zone.  The episode was, It’s a Good Life, which first aired on November 3, 1961.

Here is a partial plot summary from Wikipedia which give a good summary of why this episode was dredged up from the depths of my memory:

Six-year-old Anthony Fremont has godlike mental powers, including mind-reading. He has isolated his town of Peaksville, Ohio, from the rest of the universe. The people must grow their own food, and supplies of common household items, such as bar soap, have been dwindling. He has blocked television signals and caused cars not to work. He creates grotesque creatures, such as three-headed gophers, which he then kills. Everybody is under his rule, even his parents.

The people live in fear of Anthony, constantly telling him how everything he does is "good", since he banishes anyone thinking unhappy thoughts forever to a place that he calls "the cornfield." Having never experienced any form of discipline, he does not understand that his actions are harmful. He is confused when his father tells him that the neighbors are reluctant to let their children play with him after he sent several of his playmates to the cornfield.

This does seem to be prescient warning about what can happen when someone who has no moral compass and has not been taught no constraints about wanting everything and being given absolute – or almost absolute power.  The havoc that can be wreaked is almost beyond our imagination – but not completely - as shown in the Twilight Zone episode. 

The dangers and challenges of great/absolute power has been recognized since time immemorial.  The famous saying, with great power comes great responsibility, originated with French philosopher Voltaire and spilled into the culture by Uncle Ben's cautionary warning to a young Spider-Man’s altar ego Peter Parker. 

The danger of unchecked power even arose in the apocryphal stories about the life of a divine child i.e. Jesus the future Christ, with the potential for divine abilities.  One example shows him using his divine abilities to less than harmless results:

IV. 1 After that again he went through the village and a child ran and dashed against his shoulder. And Jesus was provoked and said unto him: Thou shalt not finish thy course (lit. go all thy way). And immediately he fell down and died. But certain when they saw what was done said: Whence was this young child born, for that every word of his is an accomplished work? And the parents of him that was dead came unto Joseph, and blamed him, saying: Thou that hast such a child canst not dwell with us in the village: or do thou teach him to bless and not to curse: for he slayeth our children.

So, you can see that great power does not necessarily lead to great irresponsibility and chaos, as in the case of the mature Jesus.  However, it can, as it seems to be manifesting in the current U.S. President.  It led to wonderful things in this case, but it seems less to have good results in the case of President Trump.  However, miracles do happen.

I hope your encounters with power may be a blessing for you on your journey. 

True Forgiveness

 I have just finished rereading, The Return of the Prodigal Son, by Henri Nouwen.  This is a wonderful exploration of Jesus’ parable of the prodigal son which recounts Nouwen’s engagement with Rembrandt’s masterpiece which depicts the homecoming of the Prodigal son.

I will reflect on the book in total another time.  Right now, I want to consider the concept of forgiveness which Nouwen explores in the book.  Nouwen recounts his journey which was initiated by the encounter with the painting. On that journey, Nouwen identified with each of the three principal characters in the parable – the prodigal son, the elder brother, and the father.   In his identification with the father in the parable, Nouwen explores the idea of spiritual fatherhood.  For Nouwen, the key to this is forgiveness.  However, he acknowledges that “Forgiveness from the heart is very, very difficult.  It is next to impossible.”  However, as he states this is one of the commandments that Jesus gives to his followers, “When your brother wrongs you seven times a day and seven times comes back to you and says, ‘I am sorry, you must forgive him.”

Nouwen does unpack just how difficult true forgiveness:

I have often said, “I forgive you”, but even as I said these words, my heart remained angry or resentful.  I still wanted to hear the story that tells me that I was right after all; I still wanted to hear apologies and excuses; I still wanted the satisfaction of receiving some praise in return – if only the praise of being so forgiving.

Unfortunately, these words ring true in my ears.  I have found that true forgiveness is not a matter of saying the words.  It is a matter of the heart.  Unfortunately, I believe that, in my experience, the church has not done justice to what true forgiveness is.  It encourages forgiveness in Christian; however, it does not acknowledge how difficult true forgiveness is.  It doesn’t acknowledge that talk is cheap.  True forgiveness does not come easily or without cost – at least for most of us.  True forgiveness is a journey which will require an exploration of the heart, as well as the mind, soul, emotions and the body. 

You are able to tell if you have been blessed with the gift of true forgiveness if you no longer wake up in the middle of the night filled with the thought of how badly someone has treated you; how unfairly you have been treated by that person; and yes, how deep in your heart – or elsewhere – you truly want revenge for what that person has done.  If you no longer are haunted by that ghost visitor, it is likely that you have been blessed by true forgiveness. 

I believe that true forgiveness is a gift from God, and we are blessed if we have received it.  However, even though it is freely given, it is not without cost.  It is the cost of exploring who you truly are and the revelation of some truths about yourself that may not be welcome.  However, as with all that God blesses you with, it is truly a blessing.

May be blessed to find true forgiveness on your journey.