Having Ears to Listen and Hear

 

One of my favourite radio programs is This American Life on National Public Radio in the U.S.  I was listening to an episode from their archives last week about how people change their minds. 

The program reported on the rather surprising results of an experiment in which had canvassers who went door-to-door and spent some time talking to people about controversial issues such as same-sex-marriage and abortion.  The results were quite amazing as they showed that after a relatively short period of time the people interviewed changed their minds on the issue.  More surprising is that the change remained over a significant time period i.e. it was not just momentary.  If you are interested in listening to the program here is the link: http://www.thisamericanlife.org/radio-archives/episode/555/the-incredible-rarity-of-changing-your-mind.

One of the key factors in this result that they identified was that the interviewers had to be identified with the issue e.g. a woman who had an abortion of someone who was self-identified as LGBT.  Another significant factor that was identified is that people do not change their beliefs based on facts and data.  Where people change their minds is on the level of the gut; of visceral reactions; of emotions; of feelings (which by the way are not the same as emotions). 

They found that the most important thing that the interviewer could do in this process was to stop telling people things and to listen.  The interviewer needed to let them talk about their own lives and tell their own stories.  I would qualify that this doesn’t quite match the first finding i.e. that the interviewer needed to be identified with the issue personally.  Their experience was important. However, that information needed to be revealed in the course of the interview in context of the discussion.   The focus needed to be on the experience of the person being interviewed.

These findings were quite unexpected and surprising because they completely overturned the expectation and common wisdom held by experts in the field.  I am wondering how these findings can be applied to that thing which Anglicans are particularly struggling with these days as we increasingly find ourselves out of step with our culture which is increasingly secular and disconnected with anything religious; That thing is evangelism.  Today Anglicans particularly do not have experience in evangelism; in spreading the Good News of Jesus Christ.  Many other denominations have had greater experience and success in this. It was not something which, I must admit, I am very comfortable with and did not receive any training specifically on how to evangelize in school.  However, as the number of people in the pews dwindle; as our parishioners get older; and as more and more churches close it is something we need to turn our attention to.  It is not just a case of survival as the Anglican Church in Canada and perhaps all the Western world.  It is also an imperative as Christians.  We are called to spread the Good News of Jesus Christ to the world.

I must qualify the above by saying that I am not comfortable about evangelization when I think of it in the traditional way of thinking about evangelization.  The picture I have is of the T.V. evangelist who would play on the audience’s fears and desires and prejudices, or the people at the door who ask if I have been saved or born again.  That is key to the issue and where it intersects with the findings discussed in that radio program.  We need to redefine what evangelism means.  We need to share the Good News by approaching people where they are and listening to their experience.  We also need to be able to share our stories and how being an Anglican is part (hopefully an important part) of our stories as Christians. 

Actually, that is pretty much what I do as a Spiritual Director.  I listen to the experience and stories of my directees and share how my experience has helped me to have a closer relationship with God.  The need for listening is even more vital than when this program was undertaken.  Our society is dividing more and more into camps in which the other side is the enemy if not worse.  The American movie Guess Who’s Coming to Dinner was about a black man being engaged to the parents of a white woman.  Today, the worst thing that could happen in the States is probably a Republican or Democrat being introduced to a family as the fiancé of the opposite political persuasion.  Canada is not that far down that road but there are signs it is heading in the same direction e.g. the Freedom Convoy of a couple of years ago. 

This week I invite you to reflect on your experience of being a person connected to organized religion  or as a spiritual person unconnected to organized religion and how that has affected your life.  What would you say to share that with someone you just met?  Better yet how would you listen with ears to hear to someone who does not share that experience.

Blessings on your journey.

Holy Humour

A couple of weeks ago, I quoted from the movie The Life of Brian in my sermon.  Specifically,” It reminded me of that wonderful scene from Monty Python’s The Life of Brian, where someone listening to Jesus deliver the Sermon of the Mount asked the person beside him, ‘what did he say, was it blessed are the cheesemakers.  That doesn’t sound right.  Why should the cheesemakers be blessed?  But I guess that’s what he said.”  That is the first time I have done that i.e. quote form the Life of Brian, but it probably shouldn’t be the last.

I did this in the context of preaching on the parable in the Gospel of Luke in which Jesus seems to be commending the dishonest steward who cheats his master.  One possibility in understanding this puzzling parable is that people did not hear Jesus correctly.  I must admit that this was probably something of a stretch, but it brings up the issue of what the role is of humor in religion. 

Often the religious among us take everything about religion and theology deadly seriously.  There are, of course, many things about religion that should be taken seriously – deadly or otherwise.  Many of us believe that we are dealing with issues of salvation and matters of life and death and eternity.  There is no account of Jesus laughing in the bible.  He did weep a few times, but not laughter that was recorded.  A great example of people taking religion and themselves too seriously is the famous debate about the Life of Brian between two Pythons (of the Monty variety) on one side and Malcolm Muggeridge and the C. of E. Bishop of Suffolk on the other hand.  The two representatives of religion – and I must note specifically Christianity – insisted that this was an attack on Jesus Christ despite all protests that it was not about Jesus but about Brian who was mistaken for the Messiah.  They considered the movie the height – or rather depth – of low humor making jokes at the expense of something essential to humanity.  It was on reflection rather a sad and mistaken view of the movie in my view and shows the nee for some to just lighten up form G’d's sake.

Lorna and I have seen the movie in the past and decided to obtain our own copy of the DVD (I know we are technology dinosaurs)  which we recently watched and enjoyed immensely.  The humor in it is, admittedly, sometimes low as British humor can be.  But it is a triumph of satire on the follies and foibles of people who look for something to believe in, in all the wrong places and in the wrong ways.  One of the many wonderful scenes in the movie has Brian speaking to the crown outside his house.  He tells them, “You’ve got it all wrong.  You’ve got to think for yourself.  You are all individuals.”  The crowd responds in unison, “Yes we’re all individuals.”  Brian responds, “You’ve all different.”  The crowd in turn replies, “yes, we’re all different.”  One lone voice, “I’m not.”  Brian tries again, “You’ve all got to work it out for yourself.” The crowd in unison, “We’ve got to work it out for ourselves.”  Thank God that we all got the point and don’t have the mass appeals of demigods today.

  I realize that this missive on Holy Humour has been rather serious, so let me give you an old joke about Anglicans.  Question - how many Anglicans does it take to change a light bulb.  Answer – we don’t change, we’re Anglicans and anyway that is a memorial light bulb so we can’t replace it. 

So, what then do we make of Holy Humour?  Can there be true humor in such a serious thing as religion?  One author who explores this is Helen Luke in her collection uof essays, The Laughter at the Heart of Things.  One commentary I came upon summarizes the essence of what Luke is saying very well:

What is at the heart of the matter, according to Helen Luke, is a sense of proportion.  Luke quotes T.S. Eliot and notes that, “Eliot is, expressing here (in the quote) the identity of a sense of humour with the sense of proportion and the humility that this engenders”.  What is at the heart of things the joy of seeing disproportion restored to proportion.

At bottom, the humour is getting us in touch with joy – the joy of being part of God’s creation.  After all, to quote a group of musical religious sister – the Medical ones, joy is like the rain.  Perhaps those are raindrops on roses to bring in another song. 

May you be blessed with holy humour on your journey.  Remember joy is a serious matter not to be taken too lightly – too much of the time.  

 

Suffer the Little Children

Lorna and I spend our summers at our cottage in Prince Edward Island.  We attend the little Anglican church. St. Alban the Martyr in the town closest to us, Souris as well as St. Georges, in Montague which is somewhat further away.  I assist at these churches as there is only a part time priest available for both churches.

Last Sunday, I decided that the hymns would be an all-children’s hymn service – I also provide the music, playing my guitar.  Both churches share a similar condition with many small Anglican churches these days having an absence of children in attendance.  As a result, there has been a lack of the children’s hymns that many of us grew up with in our services.  So, I thought, why not have a service with all the hymns we were familiar with.  Now, with the caveat that I was not raised in the Anglican church – being United Church by birth and upbringing, I chose hymns from our hymn book which I grew up singing and was pretty sure those in attendance would also know. Of course, I had the benefit of my unofficial adviser, my wife Lorna, who is a lifelong Anglican.  Here are the hymns which we sang:

Opening hymn     This is My Father’s World

Gospel Hymn       Jesus Loves Me (this I know)

Offertory Hymn   Can a Little Child Like Me (thank the Father fittingly)

Closing Hymn       When He Cometh (to make up his jewels)

I believe the hymns were well received – our small group sang them with energy and seemed to enjoy them.  St. Augustine is credited with the saying, “he who sings prays twice.”  I believe that is true as music touches a part of ourselves, we often aren’t aware of.  The hymns and other music we heard and sang as children connect with that part on an even deeper level.  They are there waiting to be accessed even though they are often neglected as adults. 

If we look at the theology contained in those hymns there is a lot which would be valuable to guide us as adults.  If we can truly live as if this is not our world to do with as we want and are only stewards of a world which has been created, we would not have the ecological crisis of Global warming.  If we truly understood that Jesus does love us and offers us God’s grace unconditionally, our lives would be better for it.  If we believed that we need to thank God for all God has given us, we would be better people.  We are God’s precious jewels, His loved and His own.

Lorna also noted that many children; s hymns speak of being with God when we die e.g. “when at last I come to die, take me home with thee on high.”  However, it did not fill her with morbid thoughts of death.  She found it rather comforting.  I must admit that I didn’t give that much thought as a child but now that I am much closer to the end than the beginning, I do find the thought quite comforting.

On your journey, I invite you to consider the hymns or other music that have filled your life.  If you were not blessed to have hymns in your life as a child, is there music which blesses you today.   

 

Lord, Teach Me To Pray

I have often pondered what prayer actually does.  In my personal prayers, I pray for many people who are sick in body, mind or estate – including myself.  But what am I asking God to actually do?  Do I want God to hear my prayer requests and decide He/She/It will respond to my request?  On one level that doesn’t seem to make a lot of sense.  If God is all good and all powerful, wouldn’t God do it anyway?  God shouldn’t need my urging to act.  I end my prayers with the caveat – “You know our needs better than we know them ourselves.  Fulfill these requests and petitions as may be best for us.”  However, deep in my heart I hope God’s will and mine line up and are in sync.

 There are stories in the Bible of people changing God’s mind.  In one case Abraham bargains with God about the number of righteous people in Sodom and Gomorrah to change God’s mind and not destroy the city (Genesis 18).  Abraham negotiated the number of righteous men required down to 10.  The bible has other instances where God had a change of mind (heart?)  However, in today’s times there are many prayers in which God doesn’t seem to answer them.  If God did there would be many people alive today who were stuck down before what seemed to be their time.  There would be many fewer displaced and injured innocent people in war zones.  I could go on but I’m sure you get the point. 

There is the case of Gretta Vosper, a United Church of Canada ordained minister who is a declared atheist.   She declares that she changed her belief about God because her daughter’s beloved teacher was ill and died despite her and her daughter’s prayers.  From what I read; Vosper believes in a God but not one that intervenes in human affairs in any way.  In the United Church congregation where she is minister, she has eliminated the Lord’s Prayer and probably other prayers of intercession.  The question remains: what do I believe about prayer?  I have prayed for people who have not been healed and returned to health and wholeness.  Some I have prayed for have recovered from sickness in body or mind or estate.  But is that because of prayers by me and/or others?  I have found Richard Rohr to be very helpful in all this. He writes:

I believe prayer is a symbiotic relationship with life and with God, a synergy which creates a result larger than the exchange itself. We ask not to change God, but to change ourselves. We pray to form a living relationship, not to get things done. (That is why Jesus says all prayers are answered, which does not appear to be true, according to the evidence!) God knows that we need to pray to keep the symbiotic relationship moving and growing. Prayer is not a way to try to control God, or even to get what we want.  

Prayers of intercession or petition are one way of situating our life within total honesty and structural truth. We are all forever beggars before God and the universe. We can never engineer or guide our own transformation or conversion. If we try, don’t it will be a self-centered and well-controlled version of conversion, with most of our preferences and addictions still fully in place, but now well-disguised.  Richard Rohr’s Daily Meditation July 21, 2024

For me this is a good reason to pray.  I cannot say if prayers of intercession work in the way that people want them to i.e. with the results they pray for.  We do have the example of Jesus Christ who did prayer and taught his disciples and us how to pray.  However, I also believe that prayer changes the person who prays. That is more than enough reason to continue to pray.     

May you be blessed to pray and be prayed for on your journey.

 

Who are those people driving horse powered buggies?(2)

Last time, I wrote about being with a group that experienced a meal provided by an Amish family here on Prince Edward Island.  In this edition, I want to explore what I found out about the Amish faith.  First, I must confess that I didn’t know much about the Amish faith beyond what I had seen in movies.  I had been aware that they were like old order Mennonites in terms of how they lived eschewing modernity.  They don’t drive motor vehicles and use horse powered vehicles i.e. horse and buddies and horse powered machinery for farming.  I had encountered them on the roads near us here riding in their horse drawn buggies and had seen Amish children riding bicycles without pedals.  I was also aware of their distinctive black clothing – the distinctive hats worn by men and bonnets for women. 

At the meal, I was further enlightened about the Amish lifestyle – actually, the Amish way of life would be a better term.  There was no electricity in the house and wood was used as a source of heat and cooking – not a surprise.  Oil lamps were used for light - I mentioned last time that a lamp was hanging from an old electric light fixture.   

The first indication of their faith life was the blessing at the beginning of the meal.  I discovered on-line later that this is a common way of praying for the Amish.  I enquired after the meal about the Amish religious life of that community.  I was informed that the community of nineteen families had three ministers and one bishop.  The worship service on Sundays was held at different homes – no church building.  The worship had hymns at the beginning and end of the worship service which were sung acapella in German.  There was silent prayer as well as spoken prayers including the Lord’s Prayer and a sermon by one of the ministers or the bishop and readings of scripture.  I neglected to find out it the bible they used was also in German.  However, research online notes that the Amish typically use a German version of the Martin Luther Bible. 

Putting the Amish faith in the context of the Christian religion - according to Wikipedia, “The Amish church began with a schism in Switzerland within a group of Swiss and Alsatian Mennonite Anabaptists in 1693 led by Jakob Ammann. Those who followed Ammann became known as Amish.”  Below is a wonderful illustration of the Christian Family Tree with all its many branches which was provided by Murray Watson who teaches courses in Religion at Huron University College.  Note that the Amish are on the Radical/Anabaptist branch of the tree which is comprised of the Hutterites, the Amish and the Mennonites.  The chart shows the membership of the Anabaptist branch has an estimated membership of five million in 2014. 

There is much about the Amish way of life that is commendable in this day and age.  The people who hosted the meal were jovial and upbeat and seemed to be very content in the life they have.  They appear to live their faith which is something which many Chirstian don’t do in my estimation.  We would be blessed to follow their example and live out our faith – whatever it is – more fully. 

    

Who are those people driving horse powered buggies?

Last week, the Tuesday morning coffee group that Lorna and I attend, had lunch at an Amish farm near us.  We have been aware of the presence of Amish families on Prince Edward Island – Canada’s island province.  for the last ten years or so but we have never had a lot of contact with them.  We have encountered the buggies at various times in our travels and have bought a few things from them but had little contact otherwise.  We were looking forward to this experience as a way of getting to know them and know more about the Amish. 

A group of seventeen members of the coffee group carpooled to the farm and our expectations were more than met.  The dinner was hosted by a woman and her two adult daughters.  The man of the house – a farrier (blacksmith) – was away for work.  The main course of chicken was on a large BBQ operated by one of the women - apparently BBQing is not men’s work for the Amish as it is in my family. 

The meal – definitely not a lunch – consisted of BBQ chicken, unique potato salad (the recipe available) and other salads, water and lemonade, with coffee and tea along with huge portions of strawberry upside-down cake with cream for dessert.  Most of the food was raised by the host family or the community with a few things such as salad dressing was store bought.  The hostess noted that they  raise as much produce as possible as food prices in stores are incredibly expensive – no argument here from the person who does most of the shopping for Lorna and me.  We were seated indoor at a large table (two actually pushed together) in very comfortable conditions.  It was interesting that the original fluorescent light fixture had an oil lamp hanging from it. 

 It was a case of loaves and fishes as the quantity of food was limitless with more left over than we consumed - the quality matches the quantity  The hostess noted that this would be shared with other families in their community.

There are three young sons in the family who gave us a demonstration of the buggy they have which is powered by a pony named Judy who is twenty plus years old but very lively.  It is not driven on the roads because the pony is not shoed – perhaps a case of the cobbler’s children going barefoot.  We also got a tour of the barn and saw a new litter of bunnies – more than cute – we didn’t question what lay in store for them in the future.

A member of our group gave an account of how the Amish came to P.E.I.  She got to know Amish people back in Ontario due to her love and experience with draught horses.  The Amish were looking for new opportunities to farm and the land in Southern Ontario was too expensive.  They tried Northern Ontario, but the Canadian Shield defeated them as the land was too rocky to plow with horsepower.  Our group member has been visiting our Island province and was aware that there was good farmland available at very reasonable prices.  She assisted Amish families to relocate to P.E.I. starting about ten years ago.  There are now nineteen families who are purchased existing farm some of which had fallen into a state of disrepair and revitalized them. 

I inquired of one of the Amish ladies about their community life and worship life.  I will delve into what I was told and what I subsequently found out about the Amish religious life in the next edition.  I am very grateful to have had this introduction to the Amish community.  Our hosts were very gracious and welcoming and jovial and seem to fully embrace their lives. 

I believe they are truly blessed as I hope we can all be on our journey.

 

Growing Old

American essayist and wise woman, Helen Luke, in her book Old Age - Journey into Simplicity, writes of the challenge of growing old as opposed to aging chronologically - her emphasis being on ‘growing’.   I first read this work, along with other works by Luke, when I was in my early sixties.  I embraced that approach, and it has been a goal of mine to do just that – grow old with the emphasis on growing.  I have done this haltingly with very mixed results.   Now that quite a bit of time has passed since then and I am old by most definitions – turning 75 recently, I think it would be useful to revisit what I wrote in my reflection on that work.  This was a reflection on Luke’s imaginings of a journey taken by Odysseus following his epic return home from the Trojan war.  It is a journey in which he grows old – a true hero’s journey. 

Here the symbol of his former life—the oar which cut the water and propelled him through the hero’s journey of his youth—has now taken on a new symbolic meaning—a winnowing fan.  The winnowing fan that separated the wheat from the chaff will enable us to see clearly and differentiate the wheat, which provides the bread of heaven to nourish our souls, from the chaff which feeds our egos with empty calories.

 The journey of growing old is one of increasing humility—where we see clearly the folly of youth—the striving and the conquests that youth is inevitably err to.  Will we give in to the temptation to hold onto the dream of recapturing our fading youth or will we seek the new way in which our oars will become winnowing fans. Again, we face a challenge—to plant the oar of our last journey in a new land that will grow as we continue to explore the new land of our growing old.

 As the signs of aging creep up on me and I resign myself to the increasing challenges of greeting a new day with less vigor than usual and I have what seems to be more “senior moments”, I can see that this new land of growing old is not for the faint of heart.  It will bring new challenges as my horizon shrinks – and not just because I need a new prescription for my glasses.  I find myself a stranger in a strange land. This new land requires a new way to navigate through it which I am just beginning to explore, and I haven’t discovered a GPS that truly works yet. 

I will close with a quote from Atul Gawande, a physician and author who has explored this land with his patients and himself with great patience and wisdom:

 

And what I realized is, we were not really talking about death or dying. We were really talking about: How do you live a good life all the way to the very end, with whatever comes? And that’s where you begin to unpack. 

 May we be blessed to all grow old on our journey in this new land.