Being Truly Humble

I am currently leading a Lenten book study at my church, St. John the Evangelist, Strathroy, Ontario.  We are studying The Prodigal God by Timothy Keller.  The book is an analysis of Jesus’ parable of the Prodigal Son. 

One of the points the author makes is that the Father in the parable puts aside his station and acts in a way that the patriarch in his time would not.  He accedes to the demand of the younger, prodigal son to give him his share of his inheritance.  Keller notes that this is like the son saying to the father, you are dead to me as the inheritance would not be given until the father was dead.  If this happened in that time, the father would normally have disowned and driven out the son in disgrace.  Further, when the prodigal younger son comes to his senses and returns in defeat, the father sees him in a distance and runs to greet him.  Keller notes that in those times, a patriarch would never run as it was undignified.

In effect, the father in the parable is portrayed by Jesus as putting aside his pride and humbling himself because of his love for his son.  I would like to explore what it means to be humble.  I believe that the key to true humility is to see yourself clearly. 

Cole Arthur Riley declares, “I linger in the mirror, and I don’t look away.”  To see yourself and not look away is, I believe, key to self-knowledge which, in turn, is necessary for true humility.  It can be a challenge to see yourself clearly.  I remember reading a definition of humility that really grabbed hold of me.  To be truly humble is to see yourself clearly.  This was a bit of a puzzle initially, but on reflection, I realized that if you see yourself clearly you will realize that you are not the self-image that you have constructed for yourself – this is sometimes called the persona.  To look in the mirror and not look away is to see yourself clearly with all the wrinkles and spots - age spots and a hairline which seems to be receding each day.  Of course, that is the physical part of myself.  It is also true for the soul and spirit as well as the body.  The impulse is to look away or at least not look too closely at any of these parts.

Author Judy Cannato speaks of an alternative way of looking at yourself in all your imperfections.  It is to take a long loving look at the real:

She speaks of the approach to contemplation by “Dorothee Sölle [1929–2003] who maintains that radical amazement is the starting point for contemplation. Often, we think of contemplation as a practice that belongs in the realm of the religious, some esoteric advanced stage of prayer that only the spiritually gifted possess. This is not the case…. The nature of contemplation as I describe it here is one that lies well within the capacity of each of us. To use a familiar phrase, contemplation amounts to “taking a long loving look at the real.”

God knows – literally and figuratively – that there are aspects of myself which I wish I didn’t have.  They are the ghosts that visit me at 4:00 in the morning – things I have done I wished I had not done or had done differently and the things I had not done I wish I had done – it is tempting to complete this with the line form the prayer in the Anglican Book of Common Prayer, ‘and there is no health in me’.  But no matter in what way my reality of myself does not live up to my self-image, I know that there is health in me because I am created by a loving God. 

However, what I have learned over the years is that I am loved despite, or perhaps even because, of who I am.  I can love myself because this is the way that I was made with my strengths and weaknesses.  I can love myself because God created me this way and God loves all that God created.  I have not learned this easily and am still learning it.

I will close with another saying about humility, ‘being truly humble means that you cannot be humiliated.’  As someone who has been humiliated at times in my life, I know that I have not achieved true humility despite my best efforts.  That is something I can seek this season of Lent.

May you be blessed to greet the person you see each morning in the mirror with humility and also acceptance and understanding.