Last Friday Lorna and I attended the funeral of Rev. Dr. Eldon Hay. Eldon was a cousin—you could say a double cousin as he was a cousin to both my father and mother. The exact relationship was not that easy to classify. The funeral was held in the Mt. Allison University Chapel. Eldon was professor of religious studies at Mt. Allison for many years. The chapel was a beautiful setting for the celebration of the life of a wonderful man.
I was aware of Eldon being part of the family for a long time but our paths did not cross until a few years ago. We connected though this venue i.e. the News and Views that I send out. Since then, Lorna and I had the joy of getting to know Eldon and his wife Anne Pirie. We visited with them in their home in Sackville New Brunswick on our way back to Ontario from the cottage. They also visited us at the cottage when we had an open house to celebrate the beginning of our cottage life on P.E.I.
To do justice to Eldon’s life would take many more words than I can manage here by people that knew him better than I did. He was much more than a professor of Religious studies; although that would have been enough by itself. For me, the best indication of who he was, was in the care and support he showed me by always reading and replying to my News and Views without fail—I could say religiously—and always provided a comment on what I had written as well as the sermons I sometimes included with the message (as I am doing today). I must admit that this was always a bit of a boost to my ego but more, it was an indication of the love and care he held for those in his life. Indeed, when I hadn’t received a response for a couple of weeks I thought something might be wrong and discovered, sadly, that he was dealing with terminal pancreatic cancer.
In addition to being professor emeritus, Eldon was an ordained United Church minister as was my father. He was also the author of many article, books and letters. His letters were, apparently, the source of some consternation to those who didn’t always agree with the position he took. He was a strong advocate for many causes including PFLAG (Parents and Friends of Lesbians and Gays) begin the founder of the PFLAG support groups locally and was the first national president of PFLAG Canada. He received many awards in recognition for his committed work in support of justice issues including the Order of Canada.
As it was noted in his obituary, “He made a lasting impression on the lives of many students, parishioners, and persons in the community at large.” This was very evident in the celebration of his life that we attended. In all that he did, I believe that Anne and his family were most important to him. The love, warmth, and respect that his family had for him was evident in the eulogies given by two of his children and the music provided by another.
Two anecdotes that were shared captured the essence of Eldon for me—I will give the essence of them to the best of my recollection. Once he was asked by one of his children why he went to meetings of groups who were opposed to the justice positions he supported. He replied that once he was able to talk with them they began to be more open to hear what he was saying; and beside they might like him more. Another time one of his children shared that they could not understand how someone could hold a particular belief or position on an issue. Eldon replied, “Well, you can try.”
Eldon was a true gentle-man in every sense of the word. However, he was also passionate about what he believed and was not shy in sharing that with others. For me he was a reflection of who we are called to be as Christians.
Rest eternal grant him, O Lord, and let light perpetual shine upon him; well done good and faithful servant.
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