Alone or Lonely

 Last week, a friend sent me a link to an article about Rosalind Cartwright, one of the modern explorers of the psychology of dreaming and the link between REM sleep and dreams.  She may be best known for her testifying as an expert for the defense in a trial of someone who murdered his wife in what he claimed happened while he was in a dream state.  The article was engaging for a number of reasons but I was particularly taken with the details of the first sleep lab which Cartwright established.  She converted an existing room into a sleep lab making it completely sound proof and found that subjects who lived in an urban setting were unable to achieve REM sleep because of the lack of the ambient noise they were used to.  Cartwright addressed this by piping in street noise. 

This, I believe, points out the increasing level of background noise which is pervasive in our culture.  There is often noise or, if I am more generous, sound which fills our waking and at least part of our sleeping hours.  I remember when Lorna and I moved to the small town where we now reside and were shocked by the sound of silence – to borrow from Simon and Garfunkel – as we had previously lived in an urban setting close to railroad tracks and a fire station and a busy street.  We grew accustomed to the sound of silence fairly quickly and certainly enjoy the general quiet of our little town.

 If the surroundings we find ourselves in does not provide a comforting level of ambient noise, people will often fill that empty space with noise to fill the sound of silence which makes us uncomfortable.  We cover up the state of loneliness with background noise of the TV or music.  That way we will not have to acknowledge or even recognize that we are lonely.  Mother Mary Clare SLG, addressed this in her book, Encountering the Depths:

Never before in history has there been a time when people have found it so difficult to be alone and so easy to be lonely.  Yet being alone does not constitute being lonely.  To be lonely is to be deprived of a sense of belonging and of being wanted…When people are lonely, they often try to drown their fear and sense of separation by making or listening to a lot of noise.

Joan Chittister in her book, The Rule of Benedict, also notes the need for people to fill the silence in our lives:

We live with noise pollution now and find silence a great burden, a frightening possibility.  Muzak fills our elevators and earbuds wire us to MP3 files and TV blare from every room in the house morning till night…Yet until we are able to have a least a little silence every day, both outside and in, both inside and out, we have no hope of coming to know either God or ourselves very well.

 

Chittister tells us that silence has an important place in our lives:

Silence has two functions.  The first effect of extreme silence is to develop a sense of interior peace.  The second value of silence is that it provides the stillness that enables the ear of the heart to hear the God who is, “not in the whirlwind.” 

I noted last week that Centering Prayer is a way which allows room for God’s presence to come to the fore.  However, it is a challenge to empty our minds and make room for the awareness of God’s presence in our lives.  In one way it is the simplest way of praying – just empty your mind of everything.  But in another it is the most difficult as the “monkey brain” want desperately to fill that challenging emptiness with unsought thoughts.   However, it is one way in which we can enable the ear of the heart to hear God. 

I will close with another statement from Mother Mary Clare which, I believe sums up why Christians and all people should have intentional silence in their lives:

Christians are people engaged on a search, not only a search for God, thought it is always that, but a quest which brings us to a place where we are exposed to a deep heart-searching, a listening awareness of the needs of the people around us.  In aloneness we learn to share in the emptiness and lostness of modern society.

 May you be blessed with aloneness on your journey.

Whither Leadership 2

Last week, I began to explore the qualities of leadership which were developed in the Rule of St. Benedict.  This week, I want to continue with that exploration.  The first quality I explored was that of actions as well as words.  The Rule requires that leaders, “are to lead the community by a two- fold teaching: they must point out to the monastics all that is good and holy more by example than by words.”

This week I want to explore what qualities the leader must have to be able to actually practice what they preach.  Chapter 2 of the Rule states, in part, “They must know what a difficult and demanding burden they have undertaken: directing souls and serving a variety of temperaments.”  Joan Chittister’s commentary delves into this seemingly straightforward - if not easy requirement - and truly brings out the essence of what this means. 

Chittister points out what the leader, and by inference all of us, must do to achieve this.  They must encourage those whom they lead to, “struggle as they have struggled to grow in depth, in sincerity, and in holiness, to grow despite (my emphasis) weaknesses, to grow beyond weaknesses.”  The challenge of this is brought into focus in Chittister’s closing sentence of the commentary:

We must each strive for the ideal and we must encourage others to strive with us, not because we ourselves are not weak but because knowing our own weakness and admitting them can we with great confidence teach trust in God who watches with patience out puny efforts and our foolish failures.

There is truly the rub as Hamlet might say.  To acknowledge our weaknesses to ourselves, much less to others, is no small feat.  Indeed, that goes against our instincts, or perhaps it would be more accurate to say, our egos.  Our ego does not want to admit to any weakness and will go to great lengths to excuse, rationalize, and even hide them from ourselves much less ourselves.   Carl Jung identified that hidden part of ourselves which contains the collective weaknesses which are inevitable in ourselves.  He named that aspect the Shadow which is resident in our unconsciousness.  The Shadow can appear in our dreams as a dark, foreboding, character, often of the same sex as the dreamer.  It can be very helpful, and I propose necessary, to get to know the shadow part of ourselves as Chittister proposes.

The fact is that we all have weaknesses as well as strengths – or at least part of ourselves that we hold to be weaknesses. It is part of our humanity.  We are formed in God’s image as we are told in the book of Genesis; we are not gods.  However, the good news and the Good News is that if we are to acknowledge our weaknesses to ourselves and to others there is great strength which will lead others by example as well as by words.  It will truly enable us to love one another as Jesus loves us.

Blessings on your journey and do not be afraid to ask for directions when the way is not clear – or even when it is.

Whither Leadership

 On the weekend, I watched a documentary on CBC, #BLESSED, which explored the C3 church movement which has now been expanded to Toronto from its beginnings in Australia.  The C3, which stands for Christian, City, Church, is an international evangelical church which has had great success attracting millennials.

The documentary, which rightly has been criticized for not being an in-depth critical look at the church, presented a church which seems to have many things I am in agreement theologically.  However, I was left feeling uneasy about what was not explored in the documentary.  It presented C3 as what could be described as not untypical evangelical church with praise leaders, a charismatic pastor who connected with his flock, and little in the way of liturgy.  There can be no arguing with its success, if success is measured by growth in the number of people who attend services and in the number of congregations and the ability to plant new church congregations. 

As was noted in one critical article, the documentary did not explore what the church does to make the church so attractive to the millennial aged people they are apparently so successful in attracting.  It also doesn’t explore the potential danger that a charismatic leader, who almost becomes an object of worship, can cause for those who follow his or her – especially if there are few, if any, constraints in place in the organization itself.

We have currently many examples of what can happen when leaders do not live up to the expectations which are placed on them.  We have all the politicians and civil servants who have demanded that citizens do not travel in this time of the COVID shut down and have turned around and done just that because “they deserve it” implying that they are special and, therefore, the rules - which they impose - do not apply to them.  We have the much more serious example of bad leadership in the United States which has incited insurrection to attempt to over turn a legitimate election. 

The question that is being begged to explore (but not begging the question) is what makes a good leader?  As I have mentioned, at the end of 2020 (that seems a long time ago), I took a course on Benedictine Spirituality.  I have continued to read one of the books recommended for the course, The Rule of Benedict by Joan Chittister.   The Rule of Benedict includes much information of what is required of leadership and leaders.  Over the next few week, I will explore aspects of leadership which are outlined in the Rule.  I find it particularly interesting that the Rule of Benedict was written over fourteen hundred years ago but it has stood the test of time and is just as applicable in today’s circumstances as it was when it was written despite the times being very different.

I will begin by looking at one aspect which is a good foundation for good leadership.  It states in the Prologue to the Rule that the leaders of the monastic community, “are to lead the community by a two- fold teaching: they must point out to the monastics all that is good and holy more by example than by words.”  Chittister’s commentary on this expands on its relevance today:

Autocrats and militarists and spiritual charlatans and abusive parents and corporate moguls want the people under them to obey laws from which their exalted positions hold them exempt.  Benedict says that the only authentic call for obedience comes from those who themselves demonstrate the value of the law.

This is a good application of the Golden Rule which Jesus and others taught, ‘do unto other what you would have them do unto you’.  If leaders do not have this as a guiding principle, he or she will be in danger of leading themselves down a wrong and potentially dangerous path.

Blessings on your journey and may you have God as your guide. 

Wake Up and Live

 

Late last year I took part in a course on Benedictine Spirituality with the Sisterhood of St. John the Divine in Toronto.  Of course, in this time of COVID-19, we did this course via Zoom.  One of the books we used in the course was The Rule of Benedict, by Joan Chittister.  It provides daily commentary on the Rule developed by Benedict which I find to be a very good way to explore and inwardly digest the charters of the Rule.  The Rule has stood the test of time since it was written twelve hundred years ago. The Rule (rules actually) are very applicable to our world today and the commentary by Joan Chittister make them very accessible to the modern reader.

Today, I want to explore the commentary of the author on the Prologue to the Rule which begins, “Listen carefully, my child, to my instruction, and attend to them with the ear of your heart.”   Chittister writes:

Let nothing go by without being open to being nourished by the inner meaning of that event in life.  There is an Oriental proverb that teaches, “Take from death before is takes from thee.”  If we do not live life consciously (my emphasis), in other words, we may not be living at all.

The question that I want to explore from this statement is, what does it mean to live consciously?  Coincidentally, if you believe in coincidences, I was listening, about the same time as I read this, to an interview with Noam Chomsky, the famous (some might say infamous) linguist and philosopher.  He noted that people spend most of their lives in unconsciousness.  The concept of consciousness is one that has interested me for quite a few years.  In my view consciousness is the great gift of God and what it means to be created in God’s image as we are told in the book of Genesis. 

Chomsky was proposing that people - many, if not most - are not conscious most of the time they are in a waking state.  Your reaction to this may be one of rejection and you might well say, of course I am conscious when I am awake.  There is a simple way to test this proposition.  Think about the last time someone was talking to you.  How much of the time were you thinking of something else whether it is being somewhere else, or thinking of another person, of something that happened some time in the past, or anything else.  If you are honest you will admit that those thoughts, intentional or not, consumed much of the time you were ‘engaged’ in that conversation.  Another test you could engage in is trying to think about nothing.  Empty you mind – or try to – and see how long it is before some thought enters into you head unsought.

One of my regular spiritual practices is to engage in Centering Prayer on a daily basis.  This involved being in a state in which I empty my mind of thoughts for twenty minutes.  The idea is this allows God full access to my self without the day-to-day thoughts getting in the way.  If, or better when, thoughts enter I let them go using a “sacred word” to return my focus or non-focus to being open and receptive.  In invite you to give it a try and see how it works for you.

If you want an example of what happens when they are in an unconscious state, you only have to look at the videos of the mob which invaded the United States Capital building last week.  Many of them were there without being conscious of the consequences of their actions and or even their actual motivations.  It was a case of mob rule.  The collective consciousness of a mob is much lower than the consciousness of the individuals involved. 

If you want to practice consciousness and live more fully, one way you can do this is to pay attention for a set period and see if you can identify the times in which your mind wanders or times in which thoughts enter your mind unsought.  Do this for a perhaps five or ten minutes at ta time and be conscious of what is going on in your head.  Remember, if we do not live life consciously, we may not be living at all.

Blessing on your journey and be conscious of where God is on that journey. 

Confronting and Affirming

Lorna and I are currently enrolled in a course in Benedictine Spirituality which is being offered by The Sisterhood of St. John the Divine (SSJD) in Toronto.  It is being offered via ZOOM which enables us to participate in the course.  The current COVID Pandemic has opened up many possibilities for distance learning.  So, this very dark cloud does have at least one silver lining. 

 We have attended the first of six classes, so it is early days.  However, my assessment is that it will be a very positive experience.  I did not have much information about St. Benedict or Benedictine Spirituality prior to this and am impressed by the strict nature of the rule and Benedictine life of those who dedicate themselves to it.  It is not for the faint of spiritual heart.

We are using two books as the primary reading, The Way of St. Benedict by Rowan Williams (the former Archbishop of Canterbury) and The Rule of Benedict by Joan Chittister, a renowned, prolific theologian and author.  They are both very good introductions to Benedictine life and how it can apply to life today.

Reading Williams yesterday, there was a passage which struck me as very much on point with the situation facing us with the current pandemic.  The sentence is from his chapter Benedict and the Future if Europe:

We need to recover Benedict as that kind of patron for our presently confusing continent; there is still much to do to spell out further the ways in which, both confronting and affirming (my emphasis), his Rule may open some windows in a rather airless political room and create a true workshop for the spirit (chapter 4). Page 83

This applies of course as much or more to this continent as to Europe.  I was particularly struck with the phrase “confronting and affirming” as it applies to the current resistance which people are demonstrating to rules for how to operate in the pandemic; including wearing masks and restriction on activities and businesses.   I must confess that my initial reaction to the protests has been a desire to confront rather than affirm.  I find the people who demonstrate for freedom to put their own health and lives and the health and lives of others at risk to be short sighted and selfish.  However, on reflection I don’t believe that attitude is very helpful or Christian.

So, to follow the Benedictine Rule, how can I be affirming of this approach to the position?  I think that there are likely many reasons for people objecting to the restrictions placed on them.  Perhaps part of it is due to fear of the unknown; some may be due to the lack of control people find in this situation which seems to be unending.  There may also be a reflection of the lack of trust in institutions and in government which has developed in the recent decades.  People don’t seem to know who to trust these days with the spread of “fake news” on social media – there does seem to be a significant number of people that just don’t believe that the pandemic is as bad as reported or even that it is actually real.

This is, of course, is supposition on my part.  However, it does enable me to appreciate those actions with an attitude that is more affirming and less confronting.  I believe that the Rule which can be applied for everyone today is the Golden Rule i.e. do unto others as you want them to do to you.  For Christians, this is can be understood as the great commandment of Jesus – to love your neighbour as yourself.  We can love one another and prayer that this pandemic will be brought under control and intimately defeated so that there will be no more need for masks and social distancing and people being hospitalized and dying because of it. 

Blessing on you journey and please care for one another.