True Forgiveness

 I have just finished rereading, The Return of the Prodigal Son, by Henri Nouwen.  This is a wonderful exploration of Jesus’ parable of the prodigal son which recounts Nouwen’s engagement with Rembrandt’s masterpiece which depicts the homecoming of the Prodigal son.

I will reflect on the book in total another time.  Right now, I want to consider the concept of forgiveness which Nouwen explores in the book.  Nouwen recounts his journey which was initiated by the encounter with the painting. On that journey, Nouwen identified with each of the three principal characters in the parable – the prodigal son, the elder brother, and the father.   In his identification with the father in the parable, Nouwen explores the idea of spiritual fatherhood.  For Nouwen, the key to this is forgiveness.  However, he acknowledges that “Forgiveness from the heart is very, very difficult.  It is next to impossible.”  However, as he states this is one of the commandments that Jesus gives to his followers, “When your brother wrongs you seven times a day and seven times comes back to you and says, ‘I am sorry, you must forgive him.”

Nouwen does unpack just how difficult true forgiveness:

I have often said, “I forgive you”, but even as I said these words, my heart remained angry or resentful.  I still wanted to hear the story that tells me that I was right after all; I still wanted to hear apologies and excuses; I still wanted the satisfaction of receiving some praise in return – if only the praise of being so forgiving.

Unfortunately, these words ring true in my ears.  I have found that true forgiveness is not a matter of saying the words.  It is a matter of the heart.  Unfortunately, I believe that, in my experience, the church has not done justice to what true forgiveness is.  It encourages forgiveness in Christian; however, it does not acknowledge how difficult true forgiveness is.  It doesn’t acknowledge that talk is cheap.  True forgiveness does not come easily or without cost – at least for most of us.  True forgiveness is a journey which will require an exploration of the heart, as well as the mind, soul, emotions and the body. 

You are able to tell if you have been blessed with the gift of true forgiveness if you no longer wake up in the middle of the night filled with the thought of how badly someone has treated you; how unfairly you have been treated by that person; and yes, how deep in your heart – or elsewhere – you truly want revenge for what that person has done.  If you no longer are haunted by that ghost visitor, it is likely that you have been blessed by true forgiveness. 

I believe that true forgiveness is a gift from God, and we are blessed if we have received it.  However, even though it is freely given, it is not without cost.  It is the cost of exploring who you truly are and the revelation of some truths about yourself that may not be welcome.  However, as with all that God blesses you with, it is truly a blessing.

May be blessed to find true forgiveness on your journey.  

Sermon July 14, 2013: WHich Wolf Will We Feed

There is a story from North American native Indians – I guess you could call it a proverb. 

An old Cherokee told his grandson: “My son, there is a battle between two wolves inside us all. One is Evil. It is anger, jealousy, greed, resentment, inferiority, lies and ego. The other is Good. It is joy, peace, love, hope, humility, kindness, empathy and truth.”

The boy thought about it, and asked: “Grandfather, which wolf wins?”

The old man quietly replied: “The one you feed.”

That story is applicable to both the epistle and the Gospel for today.  In the Epistle from Romans, Paul is telling is that we have a war within us about which side we will serve – will we be slaves to sin or will we be servants to righteousness?  The Gospel tells of one of the well-known events in the ministry of Jesus when he feeds the multitude with five loaves and two fishes.  The multitude is satisfied abundantly with more than enough left over – more than they started with.  In effect which side in the battle will we serve – which wolf will we feed?  How will we feed our souls with material food or spiritual food?

The epistle (Romans 6:17) tells us that if we feed the evil wolf we are slaves to sin.  However, if we feed the good wolf we will be servants to God.  One interesting thing about this comparison is the Greek work for servant and slave.  The New Testament - when it was finally written down - was originally written in Greek. 

One of the things I remember from my course in Greek at seminary was that the Greek word Doulos means both slave and servant.  We have the same word being used differently – the translators used slave in one place – slave to sin.  The other is servant to God.  I’m sure they used the two different words in translation because of the context in which they are used.  There is a definite difference for the context of a slave and the context of a servant. 

When you are a slave to something you have little or no choice in the matter.  We don’t consider slavery much these days.  After all, slavery was defeated in the 18^th and 19^th century for the most part.  There was the great civil war in our neighbours to the south a hundred and fifty years ago that emancipated the slaves.  Unfortunately the United States is still dealing with many of the consequences in their relations between blacks and whites.  There are still two wolves fighting in many ways in that land.  Of course we Anglicans can be proud of the role of William Wilberforce an Anglican reformer who was the force behind the abolition of slavery in Britain in the 18^th Century.  He was inspired in part by John Newton the author of Amazing Grace and a reformed slave ship captain.  However, slavery was an integral part of the world in Jesus’ time.  The first Christians including Paul accepted slavery as normal part of society. 

So today, how do we relate to slavery that Paul talks about?  Well even though physical slavery has been abolished in the Western world we have many other kinds of slavery.  We have many things in society that we can be enslaved by.  We can be enslaved to money or drugs or material possession or even power.  When we become enslaved to something like alcohol or anything else we lose our choices.  Someone who is addicted has lost control of his life. 

The addict may believe that that they are in control – I can give up x any time I want to - but in truth the thing they are addicted to is controlling them.  They have becomes slaves to sin.

When we think of sin we often mistakenly believe we are taking strictly about moral behavior – committing adultery or stealing or any of the ‘nots’ in the Ten Commandments.  However, I find that the best way of thinking of sin is ‘something – anything that separates us from the love of God and from leading the life that God intends for us. 

This brings us to the Gospel and the image of being fed by Jesus.  We have the wonderful account of Jesus feeding the multitude with a few loaves of bread and even fewer small fish.  The account presents Jesus feeding the bodies of those that gathered to hear him.  Their bodies were indeed fed by the bread and the fish but they were fed in another way.  Their souls and spirits were undoubtedly fed by Jesus.  That is why they were gathered to be with him.  They recognized that their spirit was not being fed by their present lives – by the religious leaders of their community.  The Gospel tells us that many had come from distances to experience Jesus.  They knew on some level that their spirits were hungering for the bread of heaven.   Just as we are fed by the body and blood of Jesus when we receive the Eucharist they ate and were filled in their bodies and their souls.

So the question remains which wolf are we going to feed in our lives?  The one that is Evil – the one that is anger, jealousy, greed, resentment, inferiority, lies and ego.  Or are we going to feed the one that is Good – the one that is joy, peace, love, hope, humility, kindness, empathy and truth.” 

The boy thought about it, and asked: “Grandfather, which wolf wins?”

The old man quietly replied: “The one you feed.”

Amen.

Reading the Bible 18 Gen 27: Mom (and God) Always Liked You Best

Family dynamics are certainly are certainly front and centre in this episode of biblical Dynasty.  In any family the issue of favourites is an underlying theme.  The old comedy duo the Smothers Brothers played this up with Tommy giving voice to the eternal cry ‘Mom always liked you best’.   In modern parenting theory even if you are aware of preference for one child over others you are supposed to do everything possible to disguise it and certainly not overtly show your true feeling – as difficult as that may be at times.

Of course God – YHWH did not have compunction about showing favouritism as we saw with Cain and Able.  I wonder if Cain was the early type of Tommy Smothers – God always liked you best.  However, for us mortals we do not have that luxury – at least on a guilt free basis.  Rebekah did not have any compunction in plotting to ensure that her favourite Jacob received Isaac’s blessing. 

It is easy to be critical of Rebekah from our 21^st Century perspective.  However, putting aside the obvious favouritism that Rebekah showed Jacob perhaps she chose as she did because she knew her sons as only a mother can.  She knew that Jacob was the one to fulfil the covenant with YHWH.  He had what it would take to be the next step in the Abraham’s descendants who would be as numerous as the stars in the heavens.   In her mind Esau with his lack of foresight and planning could not fulfill God’s plan for His chosen people.  Given the benefit of hindsight can we say that Rebekah chose badly or selfishly?  IN any case it is always nice when God’s will and our egos are aligned.  That can be dangerous but that is another story.