The Humble vs Pride Challenge

‘I am the most humble person in the world!’  We know immediately there is something wrong with that statement — even if we’re not quite sure what.  If someone is humble, they do not think of themselves in comparison to others.  In fact, the person who makes that statement is ironically prideful about their humility — which means that he or she is basically not humble.   There is an interesting variation on pride which I have run into recently; it has been coined as the humble-brag.  The person who humble- brags gets to blow his or her horn and yet appears on the surface as being humble. It can go something like this, “I am so humbled and honoured to be awarded this great award.  I don’t deserve it but it is wonderful to be able to do the great things that I have done.”  In effect the person is saying, “aren’t I wonderful I   have done these great things and am humble as well.  Quite a neat trick, the humble-brag. 

Pride does not get very good press in the bible.  Here are a few of the verses which deal with pride: Pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall (Proverbs); One's pride will bring him low, but he who is lowly in spirit will obtain honour (Proverbs); For people will be lovers of self, lovers of money, proud, arrogant, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy (2 Timothy);  Not that we dare to classify or compare ourselves with some of those who are commending themselves.

Pride is definitely frowned upon by God and by the first Christian leaders.  With this very clearly negative view of pride I’m surprized that its opposite, humility didn’t make it into the Beatitudes.  

Let’s look at humility – the state of being humble.  Here are a few examples of how humility is viewed in the bible: Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves (Philippians); The reward for humility and fear of the Lord is riches and honour and life (Proverbs); Whoever exalts himself will be humbled, and whoever humbles himself will be exalted (Matt.); Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will exalt you (James).  Our Epistle set out humility in opposition to pride – God resists the proud, and gives grace to the humble.  Another passage gives a similar comparison, “When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with the humble is wisdom” (Proverbs).   We can see that it doesn’t seem that pride and humility can exist at the same time. 

That is why that first statement I made is just wrong.  If you are truly humble you are not going to believe you are more humble than everyone else or even anyone else.  You aren’t going to compare yourself to others — you just are who you are.

Indeed, our culture today certainly promotes pride as a good thing.  We are not encouraged to downplay our accomplishments and abilities.  We are told that to be successful we need to trumpet our accomplishments in social media.  If we are in business we see that those who don’t promote themselves don’t get customers — at least not many.  It seems that the sizzle is more important than the steak.  So it seems that to be a Christian then is to be counter cultural — to be against the culture.  I guess that shouldn’t come as a surprise to us.   As Christians we are told to turn the other cheek; to go the second mile; to love our neighbours — better, to love our enemies. 

One of the reasons that true humility is difficult is because it is natural to compare ourselves to others.  We want to know how we are doing and the way we seem to do that most naturally is in relationship to others.  We seem to receive that lesson right from the cradle.  We are told directly or indirectly that we should be like others – and by implication do better than others. 

We are given marks in school and by implication are those marks better marks the others —where do we stand in the class.  Even our play is turned into competition — we are taught that winning is good and losing is bad or at best it is an opportunity to learn from our mistakes and by learning win the next time.  We win awards in life – medals in sports and academia — we get the job and after that the promotion.  By implication others do not succeed and therefore we conclude that we are better than others. 

How are we to become truly humble?  Is it something that we can work to become or is it something that will be given to us as grace from God?  One of the best definitions of humility that I have come across is by Sister Jane — an Anglican Nun.  She defines humility as ‘seeing clearly’ — to be humble is to see clearly.  When I first read that I was puzzled by that.  How was humility related to seeing things clearly?  Well I first thought that if we clearly see ourselves as we are we will know that we don’t compare that well to others at least some others in the world.  No matter how much we succeed there will be others who are better at us in whatever way we judge ourselves.  Even world champions are not the best in everything or even many things. 

However, on reflection I believe that to see clearly means that we can see what is truly important in life — we can see what is truly important to God.  I don’t believe that God wants us to be better than others.  God wants us to be the person that God intends us to be. 

God does want us to develop and grow and become fully mature human being.  I believe that we have a human need to be better than others because we believe deep down that that is the only way we will be of value — the only way we will valued by others and by God. 

If we can truly come to believe and know that God loves us unconditionally — that God loves us because we are God’s beloved children than we can just be the people of God.  That is something to be proud of. 

 

Peace on Earth

Last week I began the Advent Journey - Advent is a time of preparation for the advent of the birth of the Christ Child.  It is a season of the church year which, regrettably is trampled in the rush to begin the celebration of Christmas and the material expression of what is actually a celebration of Bacchanalia in our culture with the extravagance of gift buying and giving and receiving.

The idea of giving at Christmas is, in and of itself, a positive thing.  I am sure that charitable giving increases at this time of year as people open their hearts and wallets to give to good causes.  However, if we ignore a time of preparation, we are missing what is actually central to the celebration of Christmas.   We desire the instant gratification of all the good stuff about Christmas such as beginning as soon as possible to play the beautiful Christmas music which should not actually be sung until Christmas Eve and the beginning or the real Christmas season.  This, of course, would be impossible and even Churches surrender to the inevitability of beginning the bedecking of the halls early in the Advent Season.  However, many churches still celebrate Advent with the hope that we Christians will observe a Holy Advent in preparation for the birth of the Christ Child.

The observance of the four themes of Advent is a wonderful way to actually prepare for Christmas.  The four themes of Hope, Peace, Joy and Love are marked with the lighting of a candle in the Advent Wreath.  They are cumulative so that we do not forget the theme me marked in the previous week(s) and are able to build on what has gone before. 

Last week we lit the candle for Hope and this week we lit that candle again and also lit the candle for Peace.  The theme of peace is, of course, an easily recognized theme for Christmas.  With the Christ Child being considered the Prince of Peace, as proclaimed in the chorus from Handel’s Messiah, which I will be part of a performance later this week (yes, I know, before Christmas):

For unto us a Child is born, unto us a Son is given, and the government shall be upon His shoulder; and his name shall be called Wonderful Counsellor, the Mighty God, the Everlasting Father, the Prince of Peace.

Well, if Jesus is the Prince of Peace, peace certainly hasn’t arrived yet.  But what would it look like if there was peace of earth as was announced by the angels to the shepherds?  Peace is not just a cessation of violence.  If all wars ceased would that mean that there was peace of earth and goodwill to all people?  Actually, no.   True peace is much more than that.  It involves justice where the proverbial lions would lie down with the lambs and all people would be treated as they truly are – children of God.  Poverty would be overcome and racism, hate and violence would end.  That is truly something to hope for.

During this Advent let us especially peace and work for a world where true peace will overcome hatred and fear.  Blessings on your Advent journey.

Love is More Important Than Doctrine

A few weeks ago, I read something which resonated with me.  It was the statement (unfortunately I can’t remember the source), “love is more important than doctrine.”

Reflecting on this statement, I believe that it captured the essence of the Christian message, at least the message of Jesus Christ.  When he was asked what is the greatest commandment, his reply was all about love:

you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind, and with all your strength.” ³¹The second is this, “You shall love your neighbour as yourself.” There is no other commandment greater than these.’ (Mark 12:30-31)

So, if that is the Great Commandment, why do Christians pay more attention to doctrine than the commandment of our Lord and saviour?  On reflection I think that it is because doctrine is easier to get our heads around and actually follow than it is for us to actually love God and consequently to love our neighbours.  Make no mistake about it, this idea (commandment) of Jesus is truly radical.  Richard Rohr noted this recently in one of his daily meditations:

Of the many radical things said and done by Jesus, his unflinching emphasis on love was the most radical of all. Love was the greatest commandment . . . his prime directive—love for God, for self, for neighbor, for stranger, for alien, for outsider, for outcast, and even for enemy, as he himself modeled. The new commandment of love [John 13:34] meant that neither beliefs nor words, neither taboos, systems, structures nor the labels that enshrined them mattered most. Love decentered everything else; love relativized everything else; love took priority over everything else—everything. (Richard Rohr January 3, 2019)

I noted above that it is easier to follow doctrine than to love.  I do believe that is true; it may be easier but has certainly led to a great deal of trouble in the Christian church(es) in the past two thousand years.  That is probably true of most, if not all, religions―but not being a religious scholar, I can’t state that as a fact.  In modern times the Anglican church certainly has spent a lot of time and energy on points of doctrine.  The most recent one is the doctrine of marriage and should be marriage canon be amended to include/permit marriage of same-sex couples.  This issue is important to many people, including me.  So, the reality is that even though love is more important; indeed, the most important thing, we are not going to avoid arguments, and worse, over doctrine.

The best approach, if not the way out of this quandary was put forward by the Primate (head) of the Anglican Church of Canada, Fred Hiltz in a sermon he preached on the proposed changes to the marriage canon of our church, stated that the way forward in what seems like an impossible divide was to disagree in love.  This, I believe, captures the essence of the idea that love is stronger than doctrine.  The most important thing is to continue in loving relationships even when you disagree on things that matter deeply to you.  If we can understand that staying in a living relationship is more important than agreeing on doctrine, we will be following the Great Commandment of Jesus. 

This, of course, is not easy, but who ever said following Jesus Christ would be easy?  I know, I know, some of you are probably going to quote Jesus back at me, “For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.”  I have struggled with that one over the years and still am trying to resolve that with my struggle to follow him.  However, I do know in my heart that love is more important than doctrine.

Blessings on you journey.

Is the Golden Rule Enough?

In the last two editions of my blog I have been attempting to answer, as best I can, the questions posed to me:

Can you explain to me your grounding belief in the Trinity? I can’t explain internally the need for formal religion and rules and commitment. 

I agree that when you drill down to the bottom of all... be good treat people as you want to be treated..  try to correct wrongs when you can etc. 

Does it come down to blind faith? What drives you to continue?  Do you ever feel that your energy would better placed in just straight up social justice?

Two weeks ago, I ventured into the landmine of the Trinity and last week, I why I participate in formal religion.  This week I will delve into the statement (rather than question) that at bottom the issue is be good, treat people as you want to be treated.  We are, of course, talking about the Golden Rule which, can be considered a foundational rule of Christianity.  Some references from the New Testament include, Luke 6: 12,” Do to others what you would want them to do to you” and Matthew 7:12, “Do to others what you want them to do to you. This is the meaning of the law of Moses and the teaching of the prophets.”   Jesus is putting these statements forward to those listening as rules if not commandments. 

However, as indicated in the passage form Matthew, it did not originate with Jesus.  Indeed, a quick check on the internet reveals that this rule can be considered a universal one.  There are references from many different religious traditions: Ancient Egypt, ancient India including, Buddhism and Hinduism, ancient Greece, Persia and Rome, Jainism and Sikhism.  This list is far from exhaustive, but I believe I have made my point.

This is a rule which is therefor something which can take you a long way in life morally and spiritually if you endeavour to follow it.  It is, as I have noted, foundational to Christianity.  So why not give up all the other rules, regulations, doctrines, practices, creeds and other aspects of Christianity which can be challenging and frustrating as well as enlivening and fulfilling and sometimes even fun; just follow the Golden rule?  Good question if I do say so myself.

The Golden Rule is foundational, but it is not “The” foundation.  Jesus calls us beyond that to the even more difficult challenge to love.  This is even more foundational; love your neighbour as yourself regardless of who your neighbour is, even the despised Samaritans in our lives.  Bottom line, we are to love our enemies. 

Here’s is where the rubber truly hits the road.  We might be able to convince ourselves that we are able to follow the Golden Rule.  However, I don’t know about you, but I know there is no way that I can love my enemies at least without a lot of help from God knows where.  That help is in and from Jesus. 

Now we come to what is the true foundation of Christianity in my view.  Jesus makes it possible that when, not if but when, we fail to love our neighbours/enemies we can turn to Jesus and ask for forgiveness and we are assured that we will be forgiven.  Jesus showed us that on the cross: “Father forgive them for they know not what they do.”  I believe that even those who crucified Jesus were therefore forgiven.  Perhaps like the soldier at the foot of the cross they had to recognize Jesus as the Son of God but perhaps not.

So, by all means, if you believe that following the Golden Rule is enough for your rule of life absolutely follow it.  However, when you aren’t able to always treat others as you would have them treat you I hope you will consider the true forgiveness that is possible, not easy but possible, that comes from following Jesus Christ.ght 

Blessings on your journey. 

Father Forgive Them

One of defining moments of Christianity is when Jesus is hanging on the Cross and in his death-throws he makes a plea to his Heavenly Father to forgive those who are executing him in this most terrible way, “Father, forgive them; for they do not know what they are doing”.  That is the where the rubber hits the road for Christians.

The challenge for us to forgive others has not been treated seriously enough by organized religion or society.  You can see this in the way children are told to, “say your sorry” by their parents even though they do not feel sorry in the least.  The church says that we should forgive and so we should.  But how does forgiveness actually happen?  We can decide we will forgive because after all it is the Christian thing to do.  So, we can tell the offending parry (perhaps through gritted teeth), “I forgive you”.  You might actually believe that you have forgiven the other person.   You may actually convince your self that, at that moment in any case, you do believe you have forgiven them.  However, in my experience and understanding, true forgiveness does not come that easily. 

Forgiveness is a process which can and probably will take many years and have many set backs.  You will find that you have made a conscious decision to forgive but then the memory of the experience which requires forgiveness and the associated emotions such as anger and fear and desire for justice and even vengeance will overwhelm you.  When these things occur, it is a sign that true forgiveness has not occurred. 

There was an excellent article in the Glove and Mail, appropriately on Saturday of Easter weekend, that addresses many of the issues and misconceptions around forgiveness.  The article, entitled A Radical Grief, explores the journey of two people whose daughter had been murdered.  They made a conscious decision to forgive the murderer even though they did not know the person’s identity for many years.   They made this decision, in part, because, shortly after the crime became public knowledge, they were visited by someone who had experience a similar tragedy.  He warned them that his life had been destroyed because he was not able to forgive the person who had murdered his child.  

The article is valuable because it illustrates a number of lessons that we need to learn.  The first one for me is not directly about forgiveness but it is related.  The article is an illustration about an important way of understanding sin.  Sin is those things which ‘chain us to the past’.  I do not remember the source of this idea.  However, it is an important one for me.  If we allow events and circumstances in our lives to prevent us from living the lives God intends us to lead we are in a sinful state.  If my anger and hatred of someone consumes me fully or even partially we can not be open to receiving God’s love and share that love with the world.  We are indeed chained to the past.  There are many other ways of understanding sin but this is an important one.

Another lesson from this article is that it is not necessary for someone to ask for forgiveness to be give forgiven.  In the article the parents did not even know who the murderer of their daughter was.  However, they made a conscious decision to forgive them.  There is a common belief someone should not be forgiven useless they repent of their actions and seek forgiveness.  This can help the process.  However, it is not necessary.  The act of Forgiveness is as much for the salvation of the person who forgives as it is for the one forgiven.

Finally, forgiveness is a journey which can take a long time.  It doesn’t come easily and quickly in many cases.  They couple in the article explained the difficulty of forgiving the perpetrator.  At times over the years they were overwhelmed with anger and the desire for vengeance.  However, they continued on their journey of and to forgiveness. 

Their case was particularly poignant.  For many years they did not know the identity of the perpetrator.  When the identity was discovered through DNA evidence, they had the trial of sitting through the trial of the accused.  He was found guilty.  However, a new trial was ordered on appeal and at this time the outcome of the second trial is unclear.  The mother is quoted in the article, “I want to live,” she said.  “If we had waited for justice 32 years ago, can you imagine where we’d be?  We would have just put our whole lives on the shelf.” 

Love is the only thing that can defeat hate.  Blessings on you journey. 

The Canon of the Heart

The Rev’d Sam Thomas, an Anglican priest of my acquaintance, recently coined the term ‘canon of the heart’ in a bible study I attended.  I understood him to be addressing the desire by some people – best represented by the Pharisees in Jesus’s time – who make the laws as a god rather than being a way to God.  He paused a bit and then came up with the term ‘canon of the heart’ to symbolize the approach that we are called to as Christians. 

The heart is the universal symbol of love and in that sense we need to make love the principle that we follow in all that we do and all that we understand in our relationship with God.  Richard Rohr has written extensively on love as the very structure of all of God’s creation:

The core belief of all the great world religions is that the underlying reality is love. Teilhard de Chardin says that “love is the very physical structure of the universe.” Everything is desiring union with everything in one sense or another. I actually believe that what it means to know and trust God is to trust that Love is the source, heart, engine, and goal of life. (Daily Meditation Nov. 23, 2014) 

I believe that we each are called to develop a canon of the heart.  It will to a certain extent be unique to each of us as we are each unique creations of God.  However, we do need to be guided by the principles that are found in God’s interaction with God’s people in the bible as well as the inspiration found in spiritual writing of the mystics and others who had a deep relationship with the source of all being.  The anonymous author of The Cloud of Unknowing addresses the power of divine love to know God:

Look.  Every rational creature, every person, and every angel has two main strengths: the power to know and the power to love.  God made both of these, but he’s not knowable through the first one.  To the power of love, however, he is entirely known, because a loving soul is open to receive God’s abundance. 

We are called to soul work in seeking the canon of the heart in becoming our ‘true selves’ that as Rohr and others have named.  Our egos, which are one of God’s greatest gifts to humankind and which resists change, is also one of the greatest barriers to experiencing the love of God and expressing that love in our lives.  I do believe that through continually seeking a closer relationship with God we can discover and develop the true canon of our hearts.